Idk why i made this
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24 Votes in Poll
(I mean, "who did this job better and who did this job worse.")
50 Votes in Poll
I'm making a series on YouTube where I layer audio of famous YouTubers over JoJo characters from the anime. However, I've run into a bit of a challenge. I'm trying to find YouTubers for all the La Squadra characters, and here's who I have so far:
Ghiaccio: AVGN (obviously)
Melone: EDP445
Illuso: Caddicarus
Risotto Nero: Corpse Husband (work in progress)
Prosciutto and Pesci: Music Biz Marty and Cyraxx (just an idea; one of them is the voice of reason while the other one is the dumbest thing alive)
I'm unsure who should be Formaggio (keep in mind, I don't like reusing YouTubers)
If you're interested in the series as a whole, you can check it out here
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLxxdJJrg3oDAZOswHdXHn8ZC3bf3W5XhU
https://jojowiki.com/JoJo_Wiki
For the sake of arguing online, I've been pondering some things about Jojo's bizarre adventure and would like to hear some criticisms to get people's opinions.
I've already gone on a long argument about Jotaro vs MiH and why, in my opinion, Jotaro could never win. So now, I'd like to present an idea that I've seen and my opinions, feel free to disagree, but please, don't simply say no, explain why what I've said is wrong.
Part 3 crusaders versus La squadra
I've seen this in the thumbnail of one of the jojo vtubers, I think it was Kaleb I. A., but I never watched the video. The idea, and the possibilities, seemed much more interesting than what one person could say. Which is why I thought it would be better to get the opinion of a wiki. Because I assumed the wiki might be against me, I named this post to show that I'm perfectly alright with people openly hating me for this. It's opinions, it shouldn't be seen as fact.
La Squadra consists of 7 members whose abilities we see (Not counting Sorbe and Gelato, obviously): Risotto, Ghiaccio, Melone, Illuso, Procutto, Pesci, and Formaggio.
The crusaders have 7 members in this argument: Avdol, Iggy, Kakyoin, Polneraff, Joseph, Jotaro, and Alternative Jotaro with the world.
Here are the fights. 1 means a failure, 2 is likely to fail, 3 is unsure who'd win, 4 is likely victory and 5 means they win. (They being one of the crusaders):
Avdol Iggy Kakyoin Polneraff Joseph Jotaro Alt Jotaro
Rissotto 5 2 5 1 2 2 5
Ghiaccio 5 1 2 1 1 1 5
Melone 1 1 1 1 4 1 2
Procutto 1 1 4 3 2 5 5
Pesci 3 3 5 4 1 4 5
Illuso 1 5 1 1 4 1 3
Formaggio 5 5 5 5 4 5 5
Explaination:
Risotto:
Risotto's ability is very cool. It's also quite powerful. However, he can only flex on close-range stand users, since he has a mid-range stand. He has to be close to kill someone, but not too close. Any long-range stand can beat him, but to actually kill him you need to know where he is. Avdol's fires can be made to detect heat. Risotto can't hide his body heat. Could Avdol set him on fire before Metallica kills? Yes. Iggy vs Risotto raises a lot of eyebrows, because it's cool to have sand vs iron. Honestly, even if Iggy finds Rissotto I don't think Iggy's strong enough to kill, and Iggy's also pretty lazy, so he might not even care until he realises his life's in danger. RIP. Kakyoin can spew tentacles in a 20 meter radius. In his own words: There's nowhere to hide. Polneraff and Jotaro get the Doppio experience. Jotaro's got the suck and star finger, which raise his chances more than Polneraff's shooting sword. Still, both are likely to get killed, since they have no idea where Risotto is. Joseph has the power to predict, and also has tentacles to touch around the area, but in terms of killing power, he flops. Jotaro the world: Stop time, walk around. Touch Risotto, kill him. Or wait until he's visible. Or beat him unconcious as soon as he starts to vanish.
Ghiacchio:
Ghiacchio is right away, badass and powerful. He freezes living beings, so you can't just go toe-to-toe and punch him. You also have to figure out his weakness, since he's all but invincible if you only attack head-on. However, Avdol easily defeats him, and is the only one without the world, to do so. Now before you say "Ghiacchio's ice is too cold, fire doesn't work" Avdol's fire is not real fire, it's magic, so it can burn just fine when oxygen itself is frozen. The only weakness is water, so Avdol would be at disadvantage fighting on the river, but so would Ghiaccio. And if Ghiaccio freezes the water, Avdol is just fine, again. If Ghiaccio is hit with the red bind, it would sap his oxygen and either knock him out, or force him to retreat his stand, finally, Avdol is essentially fine when it comes to being frozen, since his stand can keep him safe. Yeah, everyone else dies though. Kakyoin might be able to spot and shoot the oxygen area, but it's really unlikely, and he could just get gently wept. The world: Teleport behind him. Star finger through the hole. GG.
Melone:
Melone is kinda busted considering he's the jojo part 5 equivalent of a halo camper. He can just wait, while his ability attacks without putting him in any real danger, and you can't track him down. Aside from baby face leading them back to Melone (Which I consider completely unlikely), the crusader's only chance is Joseph. Joseph can just bust a camera and find Melone's approximate area. But even then, Joseph has to survive baby face long enough to reach Melone. Even the world can't really help when you don't know where Melone is. But Alt Jotaro would be able to survive baby face forever, since baby face would keep dying over and over to the world, so it's a stalemate in Melone's favour.
Procutto:
Procutto has a big buff against any dumb assess who think melee is the one truth. Because you fight, you age, you die. Your stand weakens proportional to proximity and he's got decent melee himself. Avdol indirectly screws himself as soon as he tries to attack. Iggy is beaten because dogs have shorter lifespams, which might make Greatful dead more effective? If it doesn't work that way, Iggy still doesn't have the strength to beat Procutto in a 1 on 1 (Imo) and, it's Iggy, so he wouldn't fight. He'd be asleep in the turtle, or just leave the train, it's Iggy. Kakyoin is easily the one victor here. Polneraff might get lucky with a shooting sword, and his super-speed move could kill pretty easy, but he'd still be aging very fast, as a melee fighter. (Part 5 Polneraff in Part 5?!?!) Joseph could hamon breath! To slow his aging! Yes, but actually no, Joseph would realistically get stomped. He's already very old, so being older would doom him. Although being able to see Procutto and his ice could show Joseph how to beat him. Jotaro just straight up wins in a melee, with or without ts. Look at Bucceratti.
Pesci:
Pesci's ability is actually pretty busted, at first glance. Hook someone, and they die. Their heart? Dead. Bucceratti was realistically the only one who could win this, right? Well, anyone strong enough to pull on the cord can yank Pesci himself, and anyone with enough range to follow the cord could beat Pesci before they get beaten. Who knows? Polneraff could straight up cut the cord. It's still game over if Pesci is faster, so pretty much everyone is a maybe. Old Joseph isn't strong enough to yank the cord and doesn't have the reach to follow it, so he always loses, and Kakyoin could cut the cord, or follow it and kill Pesci, so he's most likely to win. Oh yeah, and if you can straight up ts before you get hooked, Pesci is f****d.
Illuso:
For Illuso, we're going to say: in a fight between Illuso w/mirror man and anyone else without their stand, Illuso wins. So no "Jotaro is just that guy, he knocks him out anyway" because Illuso's stand protects him from non stand-users. With that situation, there is no way to win. Illuso can't be attacked by your stand, no matter what, it is just left floating in the air - (Side note: If Hermit purple was out without Joseph, what form would it take? Would it be a ball around where his arm would be, or humanoid because it exists through his body, or only around the lungs, since it's hamon-based?) Anyway, Iggy's ability to manipulate sand is the one chance of beating Illuso in the mirror-world. Sure, Avdol could set himself on fire right before entering, and burn Illuso or something, but Iggy can just straight up attack Illuso while being in the mirror. The sand he controls can just manifest in the mirror. Joseph could Hamon overdrive, since hamon and hermit purple are (arguably) different. But aside from being a funny way for that fight to end, it's probably never going to happen. Ts would affect the mirror world, but it wouldn't really help. Ultimately, ts before being captured, or while someone else is being taken, is the way to win.
Formaggio:
Come on man, do you see any of the stardust crusaders being beaten by this? Formaggio has to stay near you, and manage to survive long enough to shrink you. Even Joseph can realistically beat him.
Anyway, those were my opinions.
In terms of battle arena, this simulation takes the following assumptions:
Iggy has enough sand to realistically fight
Everyone in La Squadra is in the same positions as they were in part 5. Only they attacked the crusaders instead. Same places, same path to get there. The exceptions are Risotto, who has received a lead and is checking it is one of the crusaders (who are in a disguise successful enough to fool him into approaching), Procutto (Who ditches Pesci before the fight, so the opponent doesn't figure out the ice) and Pesci (Who isn't trying to smash the turtle, and is just battling for his life)
All fights are a 1 on 1, but you can imagine situations with multiple people don't really change the outcome by much. If you're with someone who wins, you win, if you're with someone who doesn't win, you don't win.
Everyone in the crusaders are in the same level as right before the Egyptian gods. Only Alt Jotaro knows how the dio fight ends. Alt Jotaro is either Jotaro from part 4-6 or Jotaro from right after part 3. It makes literally no difference.
How would they change the story and what arks would change the most?
Team Bruno Joined La Squadra ?
Who would survive?
How could there abilites work together?
How would the story change?
I mostly just want a scenario were Illuso Lives.
Who would die?
52 Votes in Poll
This is my White Album remake based on “Strawberry Fields Forever.”
On another note. I will be leaving Fandom. Maybe not permanently but chances are slim. I might link my insta if anyone wants to follow me. My mental health is just decreasing.
60 Votes in Poll
So they tried finding Diavolo's identity by kidnapping trish. they tried to find diavolo's identity. that's right, everyone has been trying to do that. passione themselves even tried (and succeded) to find his identity. despite them actually trying to keep trish safe, if Squadra found diavolo's identity, Vento Aureo would have ended much quicker if passione and Squadra worked together to fight diavolo. But that's just a theory. a film theory.
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